Bonds
by Kitsune-and-Neko
Summary: Kaworu has returned and events that stem from that. Takes place after the series. Not yaoi. Please r&r!


Disclaimer: Neko or Kitsune do not own Evangelion in any way . . . except for Kitsune's wonderful entire DVD collection of it. ^^ *huggles* Without it, I might never have known about Kaworu . . . scary prospect . . .  
  
Anyhow, this may be OOC for . . . almost anyone because practically everyone is in the fic at one point or another. Then again, you could say they are quite in character if you think of them this way. Pairings are: Shinji/Asuka, Kaworu/Rei, Misato/Kaji, Aoba/Maya, Touji/Hikari. The posts alternate every other, starting with Kitsune's. Her main character is Kaworu and mine (Neko's) is Shinji. Kitsune, sorry but I changed the first post a little. ^^;; No yaoi and/or yuri.  
  
I hope you enjoy the fic. ^^  
  
~**~**~**~**~**~  
  
Kaworu stared at the sunset wondering about two things. First, why was he reborn as a human? Second, what was he thinking? Shinji as his friend? The savior of mankind and an Angel whose job was to destroy it? He silently looked at the city being rebuilt. He sighed, his silvery hair dangling over his red eyes. This race these people, Shinji even, were intricate and complicated, their emotions overlapped and washed them like waves.  
  
Shinji opened the door to his/Misato's apartment. He heard giggling and splashing, Misato on the phone in the bath. He shuffled over to the telephone, (carrying his and Misato's laundry) and noticed the red message light blinking. He pressed the button and the tape began to play.  
  
Suddenly Asuka charged in, glaring at the young sixteen year old. "Shinji! What took you so long to get home! Toji called twenty times, Kensuke forty, and Ritsiko three!" Asuka shouted loud enough so Shinji couldn't hear anything else. Asuka continued to rant complaints but Shinji failed to pay attention.  
  
"Asuka . . . Asuka? Hey Asuka . . ." Finally she began to slow in her rant, panting for breath. Shinji smiled hesitantly. "I'm sorry . . .?" His attention turned to the still-playing tape as Asuka ranted on.  
  
It was Kensuke. His voice was excited. "Hey Ikari! Guess what Toji and I saw. Remember the 5th Child? We saw him sitting on the beach humming a tune . . . what was it . . . Oh yeah! Ode to Joy! He seemed deep in thought, well gotta go! See ya at school tomorrow!"  
  
"K-Kaworu?" Shinji's voice was quiet and whispery. /Whether I live or die doesn't really matter/ The next voice was Toji's, angry and low. "Shinji, the 5th child is back." *Click* That was all the explanation needed. Shinji turned off the tape, brushing past Asuka, "It's Kaworu Asuka." He ignored her protests and exclamations of 'where are you going?!' and the moment he had left the apartment his feet started to run, toward the sparkling sunlit waters of Tokyo 3. Toward the painful yet wonderful friendship, that had been cut off too soon. Toward Kaworu.  
  
Kaworu was reading a book. Something called 'In the Time of the Bells'. Sounded interesting and it was. He looked up, hearing distant footsteps. Probably those pests again. But there was only one. And it was light, like Shinji's. He lightly slapped his head. He was just a friend and Shinji didn't even know he was reborn. He playfully blew up his bangs, which fell down on his face again but in a worse position.  
  
Shinji paused behind Kaworu, then grinned, throwing his arms around the older boy. "Kaworu!" He felt Kaworu stiffen then relax when he heard Shinji's voice. "I missed you." Shinji's voice was happy and soft, bursting with other emotions. /You won't leave again? I hurt, part of me died when you did. Everything felt lonely. I'm so glad to see you again. My friend./  
  
Kaworu smiled a friendly smile. "Thought you were those pests again." He lets out a familiar laugh. "They were disturbing my reading, saying 'Are you the fifth child?' and I would say yes every time. But that's the way we lilim are I guess." *But yet how did Shinji know I was reborn?* His cheerful grin faded into a frown.  
  
"Kaworu? Something wrong?" Shinji let go of Kaworu's neck, sitting cross- legged in front of the 5th Child. "Kensuke and Toji . . . did they say something?"  
  
"Do you know them?" He looked at Shinji curiously though his eyes could only see half his face. *Should I tell him? No, I'll just tell him something else.* "No, I'm just not used to being a . . . lilim . . . that's all." He tried to give a cheesy grin but failed giving a more solemn frown instead.  
  
"Yes . . ." Shinji still looked at Kaworu cautiously as one might look at thin ice before treading on it. "I know them, from school. Toji used to be an EVA pilot, but it went berserk. Kensuke is just," Shinji grinned. "Kensuke." The sun finally slipped below the skyscrapers on the horizon and Shinji jumped off the rock he and Kaworu were sitting on. "Want to swim?" Shinji smiled up at the fifth child.  
  
"Swim? I'm sorry but lilims are scary. Uh . . . what would you say if I am incapable of swimming." He looked at the crystal water. *Kensuke . . . is it true? Did I really . . . no! Please no!* Ignoring his thoughts he smiled looking at the dripping wet Shinji.  
  
Shinji stumbled out of the water, grinning. "It's okay. Funny though. I never got taught to swim either. I just taught myself." Shinji shook his hair, sending water droplets everywhere. "My mother used to say I could swim down to the Second Impact site if I could hold my breath long enough."  
  
Kaworu looked at him and laughed. "Well you don't need to swim if you could fly. I have only been human since morning. But you probably could with your endurance." He walked over to his friend. "Either way . . ." Before Shinji could react he was heaved onto Kaworu's shoulder. Kaworu went to where only his head was sticking out and tossed Shinji as far as he could. He turned around and walked back to shore, sitting down and looking at his watch.  
  
"Wha?! Kaworu!" Shinji's body rotated in the air, landing headfirst in the cold water. /Kaworu . . ./ Shinji choked on the water he sucked into his lungs. /Which way is up?!/ He swam toward the closest direction, but finding it got darker and colder, turned and swam 'up' "KAWORU!" But the only evidence of his scream was a stream of bubbles rising, and the echoes of a deep blue emptiness.  
  
Kaworu's eyes became worried after five minutes hearing Kensuke's words over and over again. Standing up his grey hair floating behind him as he ran into the water, swimming the best he can, looking for his only friend. Meanwhile, Kensuke angrily ate the fast food french fries. "I can't believe that fifth child! He hurts Shinji, is an angel and asks Shinji to do something he hates and still comes back to earth!" He was talking to himself, not noticing Rei nearby.  
  
Rei stared down at her milkshake, listening to Kensuke rant. Kensuke's words, rash and cruel, had undoubtedly been thrown like bitter knives at the quiet 5th child. Rei considered announcing her presence to Kensuke but decided against it. Kensuke was wrong.  
  
Kaworu looked at the dark blue water. *My lungs hurt under here* He looked at a drifting white thing. *Shinji!* He dove down deeper and grabbed the unconscious body, pulling it back to shore. Once on dear ground Kaworu knelt over him worried. He checked for a pulse. There. Good But he wasn't breathing. Kaworu began to use CPR.  
  
*Jolt* "1...2...3...4...5...6..." *Jolt* "Hahhh!" Shinji's air rushed in like a vacuum. His breath caught and water came out of his mouth, jerking his body upwards. /Air/ It was a gift no one appreciated. But Shinji had been granted that gift once again. Slowly he opened his eyes, feeling water streaming from his hair and over his face.  
  
"You look like a dead frog," Kaworu chuckled. "Sorry bout that though." Kaworu might as well have been talking about himself. His short grey hair was sticking to his neck like leeches and his eyes looked a little purple. He smiled with curious eyes. "Do you have any injuries?" He paused slightly thinking. "Kensuke . . . did tell me something that troubles me . . . with my death . . . were you injured mentally in any sort of way?" His smile was again a frown and tears were forming. "Please tell me the truth . . ."  
  
"Kaworu . . ." Shinji sat up, placing both hands behind him as if to steady the blurry world. "I'm okay, just . . ." He clasped one hand to his forehead. "Give me a little more warning next time." Shinji tried to stand and abruptly sat down as if to plan another strategy for walking. He looked up at Kaworu, a faint blush of embarrassment tainting his cheeks. "Where are you staying Kaworu?"  
  
". . . in . . .ah . . .okay so I haven't figured that out yet . . . let's talk about it . . . I, uh . . . need food . . ." Kaworu mumbled. A groan from his stomach affirmed that. "You lilims have it hard." Another groan from his middle section of agreement. "So where are we to eat?"  
  
"There's a McDonalds over there." Shinji grinned faintly at Kaworu. "They say only the weirdoes come in after 11:00. I guess we qualify." He looked at Kaworu carefully in the dim light. "Are you okay Kaworu?"  
  
"I'm just hungry . . . not used to being hungry." Kaworu held his stomach. Obviously when Kaworu's hungry he can't concentrate on anything else. He began to head to the McDonalds. "Hey slowpoke aren't you hungry . . . probably not thirsty though."  
  
"Think I swallowed half the ocean and a couple of fish but other then that I'm fine." The world was returning to normal. Kaworu's face was solid and Shinji could read the McDonalds sign without squinting. Shinji hummed 'Ode to Joy' under his breath as he stepped into the warm McDonalds 'dining room'.  
  
"You eat animals?" Kaworu said looking at the list of food. The few people in there looked at him weirdly. "Um . . . I think I'll just have a large fries." When the food was paid for and had arrived the fries were no longer on the tray but in Kaworu's stomach. He looked at the table dizzily. "Oh . . . headache . . ." Kaworu mumbled then suddenly paused. ~*~ "Hey someone's sleeping in here." Kensuke sat up looking at Rei. "Hi Ayanami . . ."  
  
"Um Kaworu? People are staring. Kaworu? Oi! Kaworu!" Shinji's shook the 5th Child's shoulders. "Wake up!"  
  
Kensuke looked over. "Hey Ikari! How's it hanging?" He didn't see the sleeping Kaworu who had a bishie look on his face. Kensuke stood up and stretched. Everyone looked from Shinji to Kensuke back to Shinji then to Kaworu. *I feel sorry for the black-haired guy.*  
  
"Um, it's good." Shinji grinned nervously. "Just took a swim." /Involuntarily/ "What's up with you?"  
  
"Came here for dinner." He looked at Kaworu. "And I must head home now. Bye Shinji!" He waved goodbye and left just as the sleeping bishie woke up. "Note to self: Don't eat quickly . . . right Shinji?"  
  
"Hai . . . " /How could Kensuke say that to Kaworu? Planting fear and insecurity that Kaworu hurt me by his death./  
  
Kaworu smiled a little sitting up. BANG! "Ow!" Kaworu glared at the table that gave him the new bump on his head. "So guess I'll rent a room in a new hotel and bathe in a hot tub to take my fears away." Kaworu grinned, "Unless you have a better offer."  
  
Shinji glanced in the general direction of Misato's apartment. "Staying with Misato and Asuka?" He frowned for a moment. "Kaworu, do you have any money?"  
  
"Good point . . . guess I'll spend the night. Katsuragi and Langley . . . but don't you live with them too? Or did you move out lilim?" Kaworu commented ignoring the staring eyes. Lilim is not a strange word to him.  
  
"No," Shinji said, painfully aware of the staring eyes. "But Misato can take someone else too. The only problem would be Asuka." Shinji hesitated; he felt that Kaworu knew the feelings of most of his acquaintances. Especially since Kensuke's latest outburst.  
  
"Well then looks like we will be fighting . . . hope Misato would take me in after that last incident with Lilith. I mean I was killed by Unit 01 right?"  
  
"It's all right. You're going to have to come to school and all that too Kaworu." /A new lilim, that's how he'll introduce himself. And Toji, just remembering my welcome . . . / Shinji stood. "Well, we're already in trouble for being late." "Yes you probably are."  
  
Kaworu jumps and looks over. "Rei! You scared me!" Kaworu blushed lightly out of being embarrassed. "Well let's go back to your place then Shinji!"  
  
"Misato is worried about you. With any luck Kensuke will call Misato and tell her he saw you." Shinji gulped. "She's, not in a good mood?" "SHIN...JI...IKA...RI!!!!!!" Misato stood in the doorway, her eyes like lasers. "I have been waiting for FOUR hours for you to come home Shinji! Why are you soaking wet? Kaworu Nagisa . . . Kaworu??"  
  
"Hello Ms. Katsuragi. How are you this night? I am afraid it is my fault he is wet. We were at the beach . . . I'll tell you later. Oh and could I possibly stay at your home?" He smiled lightly hoping not to be yelled at by Misato while she's angry.  
  
"Kaworu . . ." "Misato?" Shinji asked after watching the captain slip off into the bishie vision that was Kaworu. "Can he stay with us?" "Hai." Misato snapped into Captain Katsuragi mode. "Shinji, get home and take Kaworu with you. Change into dry clothes." "Misato, when are--" "I CAME DOWN HERE FOR SAKE AND I'M GOING TO HAVE IT!!! "Um Kaworu, it's time for us to go . . ."  
  
"Hai . . ." Kaworu turned and looked at Shinji. "Shinji, was Kensuke telling the truth? I don't want to hurt . . .you know . . .I only have you as a friend." He stared at the ground kicking a rock then glanced at the pale yellow moon above them. *The stars . . . it's a clear night . . . they are lucky . . . stars never fall . . . or fail.* Tears were forming in his eyes again and were sliding down his face, dangling on his pale chin and splashing on the black cement below it.  
  
Shinji walked behind Kaworu, thoughts racing, fighting for a chance to be made into speech. /Kaworu, people hurt when things are right or wrong. It doesn't mean . . . I know you never meant.../ "GAH!" Shinji exploded, still trying to stifle the flow of words that would hurt Kaworu. /But, which will hurt more? Telling him or hiding my answer till I explode?/ *Plip* Shinji looked up at the sky but it was clear, a white quarter moon shining brightly, stars twinkling beyond it. He looked at Kaworu. *Plip, plip*  
  
The sun, the stars, the moon. He couldn't help being sad with the perfect nightlights out. He was just a speck now. Nothing special anymore.  
  
"Kaworu, you're," /I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away, I MUSTN'T RUN AWAY!/ "You're, the best friend I have, and, and sometimes it hurts to do what's right! Yes! It hurt me to kill you! I was alone without you and everything was empty! Someone took a piece of my heart that day. I'd lost my only friend. And it hurt. But it's right and you told me I'd see you again." Shinji paused for breath, nearly crying himself at seeing Kaworu's broken silhouette. "Please Kaworu . . . please don't cry."  
  
Kaworu tried to smile amidst the tears. "I've . . . never cried before . . . Shinji . . . I'm . . . sorry." He looked to the ground, staring at the miniature pool. "I . . . don't know if I should be happy or sad . . . but the tears won't stop."  
  
Shinji felt as if the situation was reversed and suddenly he was the one trying to protect Kaworu. /Please, don't . . . / Soft footsteps whispered through the grass on Shinji's right and he turned to see Rei. He couldn't even make an attempt to hide the tears streaming down his face.  
  
Kaworu's senses were deadened because of his emotions; a distant 'wark' was heard behind Rei. Pen Pen stepped out from behind the first child, angry because it didn't know what Rei said or why the boys were sad.  
  
"Ayanami!" Shinji said, not loudly but with surprise. He hoped it was dark enough not for her to see his tears. "Why are you crying Shinji?" -Then again, maybe it wasn't dark enough. /I can't tell her . . . I just can't/ "I thought you went home." He said, cursing the way his voice cracked on 'home' But Rei didn't answer; instead she walked softly over to Kaworu and placed her hand on his back. "I know."  
  
Kaworu jumped and looked back at Rei, blushing from her sudden appearance. "You kn-know what?" He stared at her with his tears drying. Pen Pen's eyes went into shifty mode. He waddled over to Shinji and sat down. "Wark . . . "  
  
/Get this crazy bird away from me!/ ~**~ "I know you don't want to hurt Shinji. And I know about Kensuke." Rei closed her red eyes, unable to watch Kaworu's own red eyes mist with tears. "I know you don't want to be alone."  
  
He blinked, looking at her. *How's she . . . * "How'd you . . . " Tears were forming again. "I mean . . . I . . . don't know what I mean . . ." He looked at his hands. "Humans have it very difficult."  
  
Shinji watched Rei talk with Kaworu, their red eyes meeting and breaking, Kaworu's still misty and sad. He walked forward, and then paused. /It feels wrong to intrude on them./ He walked toward the apartment he hadn't realized was so close. /I have to apologize, or listen, I don't know anymore. Why did Kensuke have to hurt Kaworu like that?/ He glanced at Rei and Kaworu, sighed and stepped inside the elevator, feeling as he had the day he almost left NERV. Alone.  
  
Pen Pen was still on his feet, warking with each step. Kaworu noticed a little while after Shinji had left that he was gone. "Oh . . . sorry Ayanami . . . I have to go . . . bye . . ." Kaworu slightly smiled while waving goodbye and ran towards the apartment, towards Shinji. *It's very cold right now*  
  
Shinji opened the fridge, trying to ignore Misato's rant. "I told you to come straight home!" She had to keep her voice down because of Asuka. "Even Asuka was worried because you left leaving absolutely no explanation. Are you listening to me?!" Shinji closed the door to the fridge, copying Misato's next words under his breath. "Go to your room!" The room was dark and he heard Asuka's soft breathing. He crawled into his futon and waited for sleep. But Kaworu arrived first.  
  
Kaworu stuck his head in the doorway slightly. Something was sticking to the sides of his face. "Are you okay Shinji?" He whispered. "Maybe I should sleep on the couch. So I don't wake Asuka up. Okay?" Kaworu pulled his head out of the entrance shutting the door. "Ms. Misato, don't wake Asuka up." He took the earplugs out of his ears. "I'll be sleeping on the couch okay?" This time he waited for a reply, his crimson eyes gazing peacefully at her, not revealing the pain inside. His hair and clothes were still soaked and he was shivering every once in a while.  
  
Shinji got up almost 1/2 hour after Kaworu looked in. /I just can't sleep./ He tried to convince himself. /It's not Kaworu, just insomnia!/ He stumbled into the living room, ignoring Misato sleeping over her empty sake bottles. He sat at the edge of the couch and suddenly noticed that Kaworu was shivering. /When he jumped in the water he got wet too./ Shinji reached under the couch, pulling out a blanket and spreading it over Kaworu. "Kaworu, I forgive you."  
  
Kaworu stopped shivering and rolled over in his sleep falling off the couch. "Eeep . . . " The blanket was covering his whole body. He looked out from under the sheet. "Oh please say I didn't wake anyone up?" Shinji could barely hear him.  
  
"Ano . . . um . . . uh . . ." Shinji's words were tripping over each other. /But he looks, so funny./ "Kaworu," Shinji said, trying to stifle his laughter. "You should see your face!"  
  
Kaworu was up the moment he heard Shinji speak. "Oh sorry did I wake you up?" He was bowing Japanese style. "Gomen . . ." Suddenly the blanket was around him shaking. "It's cold in here."  
  
"Hm?" Shinji was instantly concerned. "Are you okay? Do you need another blanket? No, you didn't wake me up. I just, couldn't sleep. Are you okay?" He repeated helplessly. Misato mumbled in her sleep, something about 'Shinji, shut uppp . . .'  
  
"N-no thanks . . . I'm sorry for making you think that," Kaworu stuttered, seeming like Shinji a little. "I can take care of myself though . . . we best sleep . . . school is tomorrow . . . zzz," Kaworu snored.  
  
"Goodnight Kaworu." Shinji grinned at the 5th Child. /School . . ./ School meant Kensuke. His grin turned into a frown. /I'll have to talk to him, and Asuka tomorrow morning./ Shinji shuddered, listening to Asuka's breath as if it was a dragon's breath. He crawled into his futon, and closed his eyes, and once again waited for sleep.  
  
~**~**~**~**~**~  
  
welp? What'd you think? Please review and let us know! 


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